A dream and a wish

I had a dream that you were with me, it wasn't bad but more as if you were thinking of me, when I was so clearly thinking of you. I have always tried to be proud of myself, because I did good, by creating you. You truly are a miracle. I try every day to remember just how precious you are. I smile when I hear your name and I love to talk about how important you are to me. I have came so far as a person, since they day i found out I was pregnant with you. And I have grown even further since you entered this world. I am no where near as perfect as I want to be, I can not go back and change anything I have done. But I can do everything in my power to become a person worthy of your respect. I love you!

I wish that things could have been different, not different in the way your probably thinking, but different as I wish I was stronger. I get emotional when I think of you. I get happy and sad, sometimes lost and confused. I do wish that I could have kept you. I know that the only reason I feel like that is because I am being selfish. Your mommy and daddy picked up where I couldn't at the time. They were able to give you the support and love that you needed. And they promised to always be there for you. I will always be there for you too, but at the time I could not guarantee your safety or that you would have a warm place to sleep at night. So I did what needed to be done. I gave you a future.

I wish i had the strength to always be happy that you are where you are. But I feel like if I felt like that I would be a person who did not care. I can not imagine living my life as though nothing had changed. I may be wrong for feeling like this but its the only thing that I can guarantee is still real. And that is my undying love for you!